#1 – The meaning of Anxiety

Blogging is hard. At first it may seem like a breeze but the more time you spend thinking about it and the more effort you try and put into something that (in all honesty) only a handful of people are going to read, the harder it becomes. At least that is how it has been for me. As you probably know (due to the fact that the only people who read this are friends of mine and that one person in America who always appears on my stats) I have been blogging on and off since about 2008. It has ranged from daily posts to depressed rants, but always ends up being some sort of review page, much like the current TAGposts iteration. I think it always ends up becoming something like that because of two things; 1) I like to experience a rich spectrum of media, be it film, television, novel, or other. 2) I like screaming about things I enjoy into the void of the internet. So a blog is the obvious choice.

But I tend to get carried away.

When re-starting this thing I would spend hours tweaking the site, trying to maximise the aesthetic of it in the hopes of millions of views and untold riches, and that is the incorrect way to go about anything. Somewhere during my creation I lost track of the passion that had formed the site, hidden away beneath the hope of success and the perhaps unreachable goal I want to achieve in life. That put an extreme amount of pressure on myself. I was close to producing some piece of content every day which, when combined with my full time job, really put a strain on my mental outlook, and all this because (like everyone else in this world) I want to be recognised for my skill at something. The unfortunate side effect of this is that I burnt out, hard. So much so I have only posted one thing in five weeks.

So things need to change.

I'm doing away with schedules and shit I think I need to do in order to appease the masses or those pulling the strings behind NetGalley (honestly I love the site but supplying me with a book that is released less than two days later and asking me to read it all in that time and review it in order to increase my percentage was not fun). So from now on I am going to review what I want, when I want. Or maybe I'll just blog my thoughts, much like I am now... how do you like the 'Social Anxiety' title? I dig it, it pretty much sums up what a blog is to me.

I am also trying to find my reviewing voice, whether that is incredibly professional or, like this, rather informal and more conversational. So to any expectant employer who is looking at this as a portfolio of my skill, please disregard everything you read... unless you like it, in which case, read to your hearts content, I'm not your mother, I can't tell you what to do.

So, in conclusion...
I'll blog when I want and forget about the stats that used to keep me up at night.

Let's see how long this lasts.

One Reply to “#1 – The meaning of Anxiety”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *